Possesive = Insecure?

Have you been in a situation or have u experienced where you are afraid to lose something?   I named that situation as “insecure condition.”
Usually insecure condition happens when people have something they like or they love too much.  For example, when we have someone we love, we mostly being possessive of our partner, because we are afraid to lose him/her.
So, can we assume that being possessive = insecure condition?

I analyzed of several couples. Some of them are possessive and others are not. Mostly the spouse is the one insecure, he or she always being possessive. He or she never allow their partner to make new friends unless together with him or her. Their life is just between him and his partner. Why? Because they afraid their partner having an affair out there. Why? Because they have problems or weakness where they can not handle and face it. 

Like a man in an inferiority complex, there’re so many reasons why a man have inferiority complex. In my opinion, sometimes when a man being inferiority, it because for example he doesn’t have a job, or maybe he has a problem in bed. Those are two things that a man should be having right? And of course there is still another reason about that. The impact of the situation, man tend overprotect his girl friend. Sometimes he never allows his partner to do some activities without reason, and finally it makes the relationship not going well.  One feel insecure, and other feel afraid to make her partner being angry (because he is very over protective). So I think that is not a healthy relationship.

When you feel secure and comfortable with your life, it will be different the way you treat your partner, compared to when you feel insecure.

So if we feel secure with our life, why we should be very possessive?

Sigtuna, an old town which reminds me of HC Anderson’s story book.

At this picture is a unique cafe, very swedish :)

Sigtuna, an old town which reminds me of HC Anderson’s story book.

Still in the winter day, beautiful white snow and yes it is very cold (about minus 14 degree Celcius). I went to Sigtuna, a quiet village between Stockholm and Uppsala. You can go by car (with car about 35 minutes from Kallhall ) or pendeltag and bus from Marsta. Sigtuna is the oldest town of Sweden, and it was the capital of the region.

I was enjoying that trip and taking pictures of nice wooden houses which reminded me of the story book by HC Andersen. Those wooden houses looks like what I saw in my story book when I was child. It is so interesting for me, I felt that I was entering the house of the HC Andersen’s story.

Oh that was a beautiful view, I also like the atmosphere. I passed an old hotel , and there is a big lake in front of the hotel. But it had changed and frozen on a cold day like this, so people are skiting at that lake.

the lake fron of the hotel had changed and frozen..!! bbrrrr

When I saw a small café with a very traditional look, I wanted to entered it. Even though it was very quiet, not many people visiting Sigtuna, but when I entered the café I realized that there were many people inside, and it was full. I did not get any table to sit. Arrgghhh. I was freezing!! Lucky, finally when I moved to another café then got warmed with a cup of coffee and a piece of cake. It was worth to visit this town even if it was freezing, coz there are lot of interesting historical sights, Nice wooden houses, café, museum, and shop with Swedish art. Silent but sweet.

Shop and galery in Sigtuna

A new year, ...year full of promises

Tanggal satu bulan satu…pagi yang indah, dimana hampir semua orang pada hari pertama tahun baru masih menikmati hari liburnya ( kecuali yang engga libur,…im so sorry beib ).

Tapi bagaimanapun keadaan hari itu, sepertinya semua orang ingin menjadi yang lebih baik. Janji baru, tekad baru, semangat baru, achievement baru , hmmmm awal tahun merupakan moment penuh tekad dan janji. Beberapa teman ada yang janji mau lebih sering exercise, janji mau menengok orang tua lebih sering lagi, janji mau travel ke tempat yang baru , janji mulai diet, janji akan meluangkan waktu lebih buat keluarga, janji ngga shopping lagi (itu mungkin kamu juga ya), janji bangun lebih pagi lagi, janji mau ngelamar tunangannya, dan masih banyak lainnya …oya termasuk janji mau lebih sering menulis …(nyindir eh).

Sejak “auld lang syne” menjadi salah satu theme song di film Sex and the city, maka sejak saat itulah aku suka mengingat scene dimana Carrie Bradshow salah satu tokoh disitu berjuang keras menerjang salju dan dinginya malam untuk menemui sahabatnya Miranda yang saat itu lagi lonely berat gara gara malam itu dia harus melewatkan malam pergantian tahun tanpa anak dan partnernya. So sweet akhirnya setelah berlari lari tanpa kepeleset salju, si Carrie berhasil nyampe ke apartemen Miranda tepat sebelum bel jam 12 malam berdentang…..dan mereka ngga sendirian karena bisa berbagi kebahagiaan saat itu bersama. Dan tahun baru jadi lebih indah!

Ternyata Miranda seorang tokoh yang disitu digambarkan sebagai cewek yang super mandiri dan cool juga sama seperti manusia lainnya yang ngga suka sendirian di hari hari penting. It’s human being right. Bagaimanapun lebih baik berbagi, daripada sendirian. Tapi pastinya buat yang benar benar sedang ingin sendiri pada saat tahun baru bukannya mereka ngga bahagia. Tapi mereka menemukan kebahagiaannnya dengan caranya sendiri.

Apapun itu, tampaknya tahun baru dipenuhi dengan orang yang berpikir positif untuk menjadi manusia yang lebih baik dan berkualitas lagi.

Ohhhh Indahnya……..

Udah dulu ya aku mau bikin kroket eh.